Film review: The Wolverine

Hugh Jackman puts down his song sheet and picks up his CGI claws so that he can get all slashy again. This time he heads off to japan to meet some old war guy he used to know who is getting on a bit now and wants to say goodbye, awww ain't it sweet. Once over in Japan Hugh meets lots of Japanese people who love a bit of sword play and an American lady who likes spitting on things. Once the storyline is set up Hugh unsheaths, his claws you dirty minded people, and really starts to tear japan a new one.

We all know the x-men franchise has had its ups (1, 2 and first class) and it's downs (3 and origins) so expectations were almost non existent for this new adventure and anything could have happened. This new story from the universe brings us our favourite cigar smoking anti hero in a completely new environment facing completely, almost, new kinds of enemies. There are not many mutated super beings knocking around and for me this is a bad thing considering we are watching film primarily about a mutant. It is not to say I don't like samurais and the ilk, on the contrary actually seeing as I won a lot of martial arts films, but it just didn't fit for me. I don't see the point of having what seems like a samurai film and then plonking wolverine in the middle of it, he just felt out of place, and yes I know this happened in the comics but it doesn't mean we need to put it on screen. Then there's the love interest which is verging on creepy old man issues and doesn't really work. It isn't a terrible film by any stretch and is better than the first wolverine film in both storyline and acting but it just felt a little off. Maybe I am being picky but can we stop with the solo wolverine efforts now and stick with the superior, in my opinion, first class series of films.

Verdict: 2.5/5

Gravity

Sandra Bullock decides to try her hand and astronauting, real word??? Who cares. She is being shown the ropes by old hat George Clooney. While up there they are fixing something or other on the Hubble telescope. They get in to a bit of bother when something the Russians did, bloody Russians, starts slamming into their ship and breaking lots of things. Sandra then floats about a bit whilst George plays with a gas based propulsion system and the third guy does not get a lot of screen time. They then have limited time to get away from the Russian cock up before they all cark it.

I saw this film in 3d, on purpose and everything, and I can honestly say you have to see it in 3d. Coming from me this is a big deal as on the whole I hate 3d and feel that it is completely pointless and a way to squeeze a little more money out of us all. In this they have used it perfectly and immerse you in the screen without overwhelming you with crap sticking into your face every 5 seconds. Gravity is probably the most beautiful film I have ever seen from a visual point of view. The special effects are nothing short of stunning from the opening shot all the way through to the end of the film. It manages to make you feel both the expanse of space and claustrophobic in equal measure but doesn't shove it down your throat. In my view the key to a great visual experience is you forget that you are in a cinema and start to believe you are in the film with the characters. This moves me on to the characters and the actors who play them. The characters are nothing groundbreaking with a typical rookie - veteran relationship but they are played excellently by both Bullock and Clooney, in particular Bullock who is just fantastic and I may love her a little. Yes it is a little cheesy but I completely forgive it and don't care at all. It is one of the greatest films I have seen in a long time and by far the most good looking.

Verdict: 5/5

Thor: The Dark World

Chris Hemsworth gets his hammer out and gives it a good polish, oo steady on. This time he is a little more well rounded as a human being/god and is a very sensible one at that. Tom Hiddlestone is still a bit of a bellend but is in prison now so he can just shut the hell up. Natalie portman is back on the scene but decides its good old London she wants to hang around in doing science and wotnot with one of the two broke girls. Chris thinks its about time he went to see Natalie who isn't best pleased about the hole New York Avengers and not taking the time to even drop her a text, ultimately though she can't stay mad at those abs. Whilst this is going on Christopher Ecclestone has big ears and an army and wants to turn all the lights off in the multiversey thing that Anthony Hopkins looks after. This does not go down well with the hammer wielding one who sets about hitting anything with pointy ears very hard and trusting too much in his ne'er do well brother. Oh and Renew Russo is there a bit aswell.

Superhero films rock, end of, and recently they have been very very good. The first of the Thor films was one of these good superhero films and the second is just as good if not better. Thor and his family and friends are now well established and are given a little more breathing room to expand within the universe they preside. We learn a bit more about Sif and her feelings towards Thor, we learn about the motivations and relationships between Loki and his family and Natalie's character shows a bit more of her personality. The story is a good one and flows very nicely and the action sequences are suitably over the top with bags of hammer smashing nonsense. Not only is the action good but in true marvel style they pepper the film with comedy moments that do not feel out of place and if anything add to the experience. If marvel keep this level of film making I will be a very happy boy, all they need now is to stop making that nonsense agents of shield and life will be right.

Verdict: 4.5/5

Mud

Two teenage boys in America like to go out on their little boat looking for things. Once out they find a bigger boat stuck in a tree that has a man living in it. That man is Matthew McConahuey?, McConnahey?, McConauhey?, I dunno, and he has done some bad bad things and is hiding out. The boys befriend Matthew and start getting food and other things for him whilst he waits for Reece Witherspoon to show up. The boys then potter about living their lives and collecting boat parts and we learn lots about both them and the naughty things Matthew has been up to.

Much to my surprise Matthew is actually starting to become not only a good actor but a brilliant one. It seemed to start with the great film Killer Joe in which he played a psychotic hitman and does not slow down in this. He is outstanding in this almost to the point where he is unrecognisable and plays the title character with a complex mix of emotions that make him hard to read and figure out. That being said the film is as much about the two boys as it is mud and both of them again are brilliant. Their friendship is explored and also their individual feelings towards mud and the decisions they make regarding him and their lives in general. This makes it a coming of age story as much as it is a full on drama. The support cast are also on top form and not a single person lets the side down. The story is as engaging as you are going to get and you really feel for all concerned as the film progresses. I must admit I was slightly bored in the middle as like myself it began to sag a little around the midriff but on the whole I thought it was great. Well done Matthew, well done.

Verdict: 4.5/5

Behind The Candelabra

Michael Douglas puts on a lot of make up and plastic stuff to become Liberace the uber homosexual piano player of a few years or so ago. He meets Matt Damon at a party and takes a shining to him, so much so he invites him to live at his big house. Once there they start having the most sacred of all love, the love between two makeup caked men. Once here ol Liberace gets a bit weird and gets Rob Lowes plastic surgeon involved to alter poor Matts face in very creepy ways. Their relationship develops again in a very odd manner and we all find out that Liberace may have needed some sort of therapy.

This is probably the campest film that has ever graced the big screen. The amount of sparkles is verging on the blinding level and the man love is not shyed away from with Matt and Michael really going for it in some scenes. Michael Douglas is unrecognisable in his Liberace get up and is frankly brilliant in the role. Matt Damon is also unrecognisable as the love interest and don't even get me started on Rob Lowe. The whole thing is a true story also which makes it even creepier. They also make a good attempt at injecting some comedy into the film which works in some respects but not in others. Despite the good story, acting and direction I couldn't help but get a little bored. It plods along nicely but in some places not a lot happens. Top marks for effort but not so for execution unfortunately.

Verdict: 3/5

Olympus Has Fallen

 
Gerard Butler has a job protecting the president, Aaron Eckhart. Not only is it his job but he is well in there being Aaron's bestie at the same time, that is until he makes a bit of a risky decision that ends a little badly. Due to this he is let go and spends his time doing something else, not sure what, and annoying his other half over a morning smoothie making session. Meanwhile Aaron is meeting with a South Korean guy and some other Koreans, presumably some angry northern ones, start blowing up walls and stuff and take over the White House. Once they have taken over they start making all sorts of evil bad guy demands and threatening to off the rest of the cast. Of course the American government are occupied by a bunch of incompetent boobs and its up to Gerard to bust in, bash in some Korean skulls and save the god damn day.

If when deciding what film to watch you are looking for high brow, intelligent filmmaking that delivers a message and changes your entire perception of life itself then I would keep moving as you are not going to find it here. If on the other hand you are looking for mindless nonsense that will entertain and potentially burst your eardrums then take a seat and grab some popcorn. There isn't really anything new on offer with this film but that isn't the point of it. It is meant to be a bit of throwaway rubbish that you can switch your brain into neutral for and it delivers in heaps. The story is engaging enough and the action is on the verge of Taken type brutality. Gerard won't win any oscars but he is believable as a damaged tough guy who does not think twice about shooting people's faces off. The rest of the cast do their job properly and the setting is refreshingly claustrophobic spending all it's time within the White Houses walls. I really enjoyed this film and urge everybody that if you want to be entertained you could do a hell of a lot worse than rent this.

Verdict: 3.5/5

Film review: Boy In The Striped Pyjamas

Right so there were these Germans in the 30's mad 40's who had a real go at being the biggest bunch of douchebags ever. They liked starting fights and invading countries and then later on killing Jewish people. They were led by a small angry man with poor choice in hairstyles who was very good at public speaking. The boy in this films father likes this small man very much and as a result moves his entire family to live on a camp, not the scouts kind but the concentration kind. Once there the small boy meets another small boy who, you guessed it, dresses in striped nightwear. They become pals whilst playing chess through an electric fence without realising that they should hate one another.

This film is first and foremost depressing. The subject matter is extremely heavy and does not shy away from that fact. It is terrifying and difficult to watch but at no point does it feel the need to be gratuitous or violent. These are by no means bad things as the film is excellent. Both the main children in it are very good and show you the horrific events of the Second World War through innocent and naive eyes. Not only does the film highlight how nonsensical some if the adult decisions are in the minds of children but by using the German child's older sister they show how indoctrination and propaganda can destroy all that innocence. It is genuinely scary what people will do when they think they are doing right. You will not enjoy this film in the traditional sense but that isn't the point of it. It will move you and show you a well known subject matter in a different and fascinatingly clever way. Loved it.

Verdict: 5/5